Saturday, March 11, 2006
Just a few chuckles as a way of saying I'm still alive and kicking, just not too motivated towards blogging lately. I'm sure it will pass, at least I hope so, because there is so much teasing left to do.
Jennifer visited a psychic of some local repute.
In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the mystic delivered grave news:
"There's no easy way to say this, so I'll just be blunt - prepare yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die a violent and horrible death this year."
Visibly shaken, Jennifer stared at the woman's lined face, then at the single flickering candle, then down at her hands. She took a few deep breaths to compose herself.
She simply had to know. She met the fortune teller's gaze, steadied her voice, and asked:
"Will I be acquitted?"
A boy was at a public pool. The lifeguard blew his whistle at the boy and yelled, "Hey, don't pee in the pool!"
The boy replied, "But everybody does it!"
"Not from the diving board!" shouted the lifeguard.
At 3 am a desk clerk at a hotel gets a call from a drunk guy asking what time the bar opens. "It opens at noon," answers the clerk.
About an hour, later he gets a call from the same guy, sounding even more intoxicated. "What time does the bar open?" he asks.
"Same time as before - noon," replies the clerk.
Another hour passes and he calls again, plastered. "Whatjoo shay the bar opins at?"
The clerk then answers, "It opens at noon, but if you can't wait, I can have room service send something up to you."
"No! I don't wanna get in, I wanna get out!"
Trucker Bob blogged at 6:50 AM