Friday, March 03, 2006
Morning folks. Sorry for being AWOL yesterday, but I thought if I gave my eyes a break it would help the blurry vision. I did'nt really expect much and it lived down to my expectation. I've accepted the fact that this tumor is probably going to put me down, but the truly frustrating part is that it looks like I'm not going to be able to make the trip that I've planned for so long. The vision is just the latest degradation of my so-called quality of life.
I don't want this to sound whiny because, as I said, I've accepted it. But damn it's frustrating! I often think that if I had to have a tumor, why could'nt it have been on my elbow, or my butt, so that it could be cut out and life would go on. As for cutting this one out of my brain, the neuro-surgeon gave me 5 reasons why I would'nt survive the operation. So I'll just forget that idea and live with it, as though I had a choice.
I led a very full life and have tons of great memories, which help at times like this. Another thing that helps immensely is being able to kibbitz with you guys on here. It would be so much harder if I was'nt able to inject a little humor into my days.
I have'nt given up on the trip by a long shot, but I have to be realistic. It is what it is. I've thought about taking a young wife, but it just would'nt be fair to her. She would be at home with the 8 children and I'd be out on the road spreading my seed. Now, if that is'nt proof that my sense of humor is still intact, then I will truly give up.
Remember, don't cry for me Argentina, because all things considered, I'm doing okay. Who knows, maybe things will improve. If not, I'll still be around for a long time to bug you. I hope!
Trucker Bob blogged at 4:07 AM