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Monday, February 19, 2007

Morning folks. Although lately I've had more downs than ups in my struggle with this blasted brain tumor, not to mention the way I feel most times, after what happened last night I'm more thankful than ever to still be here.

While channel surfing the TV out of boredom I came across a show on the Learning Channel that frankly scared the poop out of me. It was about my exact condition, a pituitary tumor; also known as prolactinoma, or adenoma.

There was a world-class neurosurgeon explaining the condition, and side effects, and honestly I don't know how I've made it this far. As he was talking his words were an echo of what my neurosurgeon told me, except this time they came with film of an unsuccessful attempt at surgical removal. I've never had a strong stomach for this sort of thing, and although I didn't want to watch, I couldn't stop.

I had a doctor tell me that if I didn't have the constitution of a horse this thing would have put me down long ago. I thought he was just being kind, but now I believe him. As I type this knowing what is going on up in the "control tower" I'm more determined than ever to keep fighting, even though at times it does get tough.

It's often said that through adversity comes strength, and I firmly believe it, because in many ways I'm stronger than ever. We all have to go sometime, but I'm nowhere near ready to go yet.

This might seem a bit of a downer post, but it is so therapeutic for me to talk about it. To be sure, just this little bit has made me feel better, and for that I thank you guys.

Take care of yourselves, because as I've said before, each and every one of you is important to me in this struggle.

Trucker Bob Image hosting by Photobucket blogged at 4:05 AM

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